I Got married for the first time when I was eighteen. I had my first child that same year. Two more children followed, in the next three years. When these older three kids were small, I went through a time of learning how to be an effective parent. I would ask them to clean up their room, allowing them plenty of time, but when I got back the room would still be a mess. Every stuffed animal off it’s shelf, every toy out of the box and on the floor. I tried threats like, “If you don’t clean up that mess, no dessert.” I would come back and the room would still be a mess. Then I would have to go through with my threat, to show them that I meant business.
After that day, they understood that I meant what I said, but they were just sad and angry and their room, still a mess. I tried all kinds of things. I couldn’t believe some of the things I would catch myself saying. “While you are living under my roof.” And, “Someday when you have kids of your own.” My kids could tell I was angry with them, so they would put a few things away, but only enough effort to get mom off their backs, for a while.
One day I was sitting in the middle of their room, every toy on the floor around me, I was thinking, “I really hate this.” When I thought of a question, and I tried it.
I asked my daughter, Christina, “Will you put this ONE toy in the box?” She said, “Okay.” As soon as she did, I praised her saying, “Oh, thank you!” She liked that, it made her feel good, I could see it on her face. Then on her own, she picked up another and put it away, and looking at me for the same approval, I gave it to her.
My son, Joe, saw how happy I was with Christina and he put a toy away, then my youngest, Elizabeth joined in. Pretty soon they were racing each other to put away as many toys as they could, and I was praising them all! I didn’t have to get angry and they didn’t have to feel bad, it was so much easier when I began to focus on what was good instead of only the bad.
I think we can use this learning experience to help in any relationship. We would do more good, strengthening and encouraging each other. Try love and praise with your kids, try love and praise with your husband or wife. Try it in your Church or at your work. Make a list of every good thing you can think of about the people in your lives and let your focus be on those things.
Philippians 4:8, “Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praise worthy-think about such things.”
I had a basket of dirty laundry in the kitchen, ready to go out to the washing machine. I noticed a red drink spill on the kitchen floor and absent mindedly, I picked up a towel out of the pile and wiped up the wet mess. I threw the whole pile right into the washing machine. I washed all the towels with detergent and hot water, but the towel came out of the dryer, stained. What could I do, I folded it and put it away with the other towels.
After a shower a few days later, I picked up that same towel off the shelf to dry myself. I noticed the stain and felt uneasy using that towel, it still looked dirty to me. I thought back, the towel had gone through the same process to get clean as all the other towels, that stain was brand new, it might lighten up in time but the towel was clean.
Drying my self with this stained towel made me think of how I feel about forgiveness. When I sin, I ask for forgiveness, and God forgives me. But sometimes I still feel the stain of my sin that is left behind and I feel as though I‘m still dirty. God has forgiven me but I haven’t forgiven myself, I still feel guilty. So I have to remind my self that what God has made clean is clean indeed. Then I need to accept the fact that I am clean.
Jesus is our cleaning process, and I am the towel. And as the towel I am not responsible for the cleaning process. So I also can’t take the credit for getting myself clean. But if I deny that I am clean, I deny that Jesus forgives, and the sin remains because of my lack of faith.
Isaiah 4:30 says, “Come now let us reason together says the Lord: though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; they are red as crimson, they shall become like wool.” If we ask, God will remove our sins as far as the east is from the west, all we have to do is believe and receive.
Change can be exciting, it can also be difficult or frightening. My friend, Lyn, was about to start a new job. She was excited as she told me that the new job was going to pay more than her old job. It was a desk job so she wouldn’t have to be on her feet all day. She also liked the idea of dressing up instead of wearing a uniform.
I saw Lyn, a few weeks after she started her new job. I asked her how it was going. She was really down. She said that the new job was a lot harder than she thought it would be. She had made a few mistakes and she felt so bad about them, she was ready to quit. I asked her, “Didn’t you make any mistakes when you started your old job?” “Oh yeah, lots of them.” She replied.
It’s easy to get comfortable with routine things. Even if they aren’t perfect, they are familiar. Who knows what things will be like if we make a change. Change can look like a wonderful thing. But in the middle of a change, it’s easy to feel bad, inadequate and alone.
When I was a kid there was a popular show called, “Let’s make a deal.” Toward the end of the show, the big winner of the day got a chance to keep the prize that they had already won earlier during the show, or to trade the prize to win something even better. They got a choice of three doors to pick from; behind the right door could be something wonderful. But if you picked the wrong door, you would find out that you now own a pig, or some joke prize. picking the right door would mean winning the grand prize.
Lyn, took a job that sounded better than the job she already had. Her mistakes made her feel like she picked the wrong door. Becoming a Christian may feel like taking a hard new job at times, you may feel like you won a joke prize. But sticking with it is like winning the grand prize.
In Philippians 3: 12, Paul said, “Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
I’ve been a Christian for 24 years and it’s just lately I’ve been feeling very different about how I pray, that is, I’ve been learning not to pray in such a self centered way.
In my church, last weekend, our pastor said that there is an, “I” in the middle of, “sin” and an, “I” in the middle of, “pride”. This made me realize that I have been putting myself in the middle of all of my prayers. I pray, “God help ME”. Since then, I’ve been praying more for others and I’ve been asking God what He wants for me, instead of trying to decide what I think is best for myself and praying for that.
Matthew 28:18 Jesus said to his disciples, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them everything I have commanded you.” This is called the Great Commission, and it is what we as Christians are supposed to be doing and I believe that is what I should be praying for. I need to praying for and working toward bringing others to Christ.
Not that I believe it’s wrong to pray for our own needs but I do believe we have to put others needs next to or before ours. And as the Great Commission shows, I am to help my family and neighbors become Christians. Now, how is it that I should do that?
I love most music and the other day I noticed that the few kinds of music that I don’t listen to, (rap and country) I have been liking more and more. How did that happen? I noticed that a lot of musician’s are using other types of music in their own music, like a rock song with some rap in it, it not only makes the music more enjoyable to listen to, but I am loving rap and even country. Using something that others are enjoying already, and incorporating Christian principles into it so it will seem more familiar to them and they can start loving Christ.
One more example is, my Mom used to crush up asperin and add at to sugar. She would add a bit of water and give it to me to help with pain, I used to get a lot of headaches and I couldn’t swallow pills very well. She would put something I didn’t like into something that I did like so that I would take it. That is how I believe I can get some to give their hearts to God.
So pray for your own needs but also pray for family and friends that aren’t saved to join us in believing Jesus is the only way to everlasting life. And after praying for others, use things you know to help friends, family, neighbors to learn about your Christian walk, and life sp that they too can be saved.
