Wednesday, February 19, 2014

One Really Rotten Year

written  in 2014 about 2013

I can not think of any single year in my life, as bad as this last year.  All of the problems started when my family moved into a small apartment, from an apartment that was much bigger.  We lived in the bigger apartment for over ten years.  We very rarely had a problem with that apartment, but my mother-in-law moved out so we couldn’t afford the bigger apartment any more.  

The first month that we lived in our new apartment, two pipes broke.  One in Elijah’s room under a bunch of boxes, so a lot of the stuff in the boxes got ruined.  The second pipe was in My husband, Mark and my bedroom, in the wall.  The complex was quick to come out and fix the pipes and I did appreciate that.  Not more than a week later, another broken pipe in the wall just above the last broken pipe.  Again, that pipe was fixed quickly.

We continued to have small problem after small problem.  Then about 4 months after moving in, I got into an accident just around the corner from our new place.  The car looked terrible, but it still ran, at least for a few more weeks.  Wouldn’t you know it, the transmission went out, and we ended up selling it for one hundred dollars.  

Then many more problems came up from not having a car.  We had to walk to get our groceries and any sundry items.  We were able to take the bus to some of our Doctors appointments that were close enough.  The appointments that weren’t close enough, we ended up canceling.  I had to get off of pain medication, antidepressants and anti anxiety medication because I couldn’t make it to the appointments.

It was hard enough going through withdrawals,  but living without these medications was so unbelievably hard. I was depressed, anxious and I was in so much pain.  This went on for nine months. During these nine months, I spent much of my time in bed and Mark and the boys took over most of the jobs around the apartment.  I laid in bed and I felt useless.

We found a wonderful Church with in walking distance, but the morning that we decided to go, while getting ready another pipe broke, this time in the floor of our bedroom, so we couldn’t make it to church that particular Sunday.  We did go a couple of times, and we really enjoyed the service.  But we stopped going because it was just so much trouble.  I haven’t given up,  I would still like to get involved in a church. 

Mark was in and out of the hospital many times during this year.  Every time he went in, he came out looking a bit worse.  It would take a while to get him back in the shape he was in before the hospital and as soon as Mark was looking healthy, he would get sick again.  

Now, there were so many bad things that went on this last year but the good things are that I had many long talks with my boys and a lot of good time with my husband.  Though we are broke and struggling, some  might feel like giving up, as I have in the past.  It’s strange but in my spirit, I feel joy, peace and a strength like I have never had before.  Though from the outside it may look like Jesus has deserted us, but in my heart, I know that He has been here this whole year carrying myself and my family, each step of the way.  Hebrews 12:2 and 3,  “Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.  Consider Him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.”      

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